1. Gonif with the Wind - a thief tries to acquire ownership of Tara through a forged deed.
2. The Putzman Rings Twice - a mohel murder mystery
3. Schnorer Rae - a freeloader tries to get in on the union movement
4. Balaboosta Cockburn - John Wayne's wife memorizes Grossinger's cookbook
5. The Good, the Chabbad, and the Ugly - a kosher noodle western
6. Moby Dreck - Captain Ahab harpoons the wrong end of the whale
7. The Cincinnati Yid - Steve McQueen uses some of his poker winnings to start a reform congregation
8. Litvak Big Man - Dustin Hoffman learns that his parents are an American Indian and a Lithuanian immigrant
9. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kibbitzer - Paul Newman and Robert Redford do some standup shtick while they rob their victims
10. Bridge over the River Kvetch - the extras complain that whistling the theme song dries out their mouth and hurts their lips
11. The Creature from the Black Latke - an overdone potato pancake turns into a monster
12. Mamza Poppins - a talented nanny has questions about her birth legitimacy
13. The Matzo Candidate - Frank Sinatra is brainwashed into thinking it's always Passover
14. Mister Schnapps Goes to Washington - Jimmy Stewart thinks he's still filming Harvey
15. Driedls of the Lost Ark - Harrison Ford plays Chanukah games
16. Aleph Doesn't Live Here Anymore - neither the waitress nor the old Hebrew school can be found
17. Borscht-time for Bonzo - Ronald Reagan tries to train an Ashkenazy monkey
18. Singing in the Ch'rain - Gene Kelly gets horseradish on his umbrella