The Boca Yente Slice of Life
 
June 7, 2005
Phyllis Dinerman
 

I have met many yentas in my life; some of whom were less than lovely people. They often carried tales between “friends,” offered unsolicited advice on topics that were none of his or her business (yes, a man can be a yenta) and generally spread dismay in their path. The Boca Yente however is an example of the finest and best definition of the word.

The Boca Yente spreads joy, warmth, insight and humour wherever she goes. In her book you will find all sorts of advice and confessions as well as heartwarming memories guaranteed to bring a smile to your face and perhaps a tear of recognition to your eyes.

Phyllis Dinerman is the Boca Yente, and has she got stuff to talk about! She’ll share with you the surprise she and her husband Jerry experienced when they first moved to Florida and realized the smell coming in their apartment window was not that of cooking, but of grass. In the city, one does not smell grass from their window, and in Florida one does not smell cooking as no one actually cooks other than the restaurants. Golf and ordering in are two of the biggest activities in the state.

I was able to appreciate many of Phyllis’s experiences and observations as I too lived in Florida for several years, although not anywhere near Boca. I was relegated to the West Coast of the state in a little town called Port Richey. My family was among the first Jewish households in the area, and there are many stories to share from that period. Suffice it to say for now, wherever we Jews gather to live there are always similar traits to be found. I always say that the state bird of Florida is the Early Bird. The 4:30 dinner was invented in Florida. Be it east, west, north or south, the Early Bird diner gets the bargain.

Phyllis divides her book into general concepts with specific stories relating to each topic. For example, in the Holidays section she talks about keeping track of the varying dates the Jewish holidays fall on each year. She also comments on the abundant food prepared and devoured at each festive meal along with the ongoing discussions to determine whose house the holiday meal will be held, among other timeless situations.

In the Family section there are wonderfully heartwarming stories of children, grandchildren, sharing holidays, the ever youthful grandmas of today, and other familial events that are so reminiscent of our own lives. My two favourite stories pertain to the reasons why she never travels with only one formal gown (you MUST read that one) and the description of her son’s Bar Mitzvah (her one much dreamed of “affair”). Read the stories for all the details.

Other recognizable situations deal with riding in small planes, entertaining out of town guests, what to take when you are moving (is there really anything not worth taking?) and acclimating oneself to a new way of life in what today passes for retirement. Gone are the days of the old folks rocking in their chairs waiting for the last breath of life. Now we have the time to do many of the activities we were unable to fit into our schedules before we left the rat race. And these activities take energy, strength and a positive attitude. Who has time for the rocking chair when there are golf courses to be played, clubs to join, trips to take, charities to help, and the social whirl that encircles us constantly? The retirees of today need to make time to sit and rock, and few that I know actually do.

All throughout this haimish book you will see yourselves as well as share in the memories, both good and not so good of the Boca Yente. The important thing to remember is that Phyllis tells it all from the heart. Her sincerity and desire to give of herself with this book are obvious from the very first page.

I have not met the Boca Yente in person yet, but somehow, after reading her book, I feel as if we have been friends for years. Read the Boca Yente and you will make a new friend; you’ll be glad you did.

  From Issue:6.06
Reviewed by: Michael D. Fein
 
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